Couples: 101 Conflict Resolution

Have you got in an argument lately with your spouse? How it went? Did you land safely from the high tension or end up hurting each other even more?

Reading Conflict Resolution yesterday,  I thought I share it with you. I also added my own thoughts to some of it.

Seven ideas for handling conflict in a constructive way:

1. Confront the person or issue directly and honestly.
Matthew 18:15-17. 15"If your brother sins against you,[a] go and show him his fault, just between the two of you. If he listens to you, you have won your brother over. 16But if he will not listen, take one or two others along, so that 'every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.'[b] 17If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to listen even to the church, treat him as you would a pagan or a tax collector.

2. Don't go looking for trouble.
Proverbs 3:30 Do not accuse a man for no reason— when he has done you no harm.

3. Agree with the person if at all possible.Matthew 5:25 "Settle matters quickly with your adversary who is taking you to court. Do it while you are still with him on the way, or he may hand you over to the judge, and the judge may hand you over to the officer, and you may be thrown into prison.

4. Mediate the issue.Have an open discussion about the matter with fairness? When solution is reached, spend time to see what lesson could be learned.

5. Take the issue to the Lord and leave it there. Ask God to intervene.1 Samuel 2:25 If a man sins against another man, God may mediate for him.

6. Listen with your eyes, not paying attention to your spouse when he or she is hurt is devastating.

7. Be each other helper during conflict, help one another to overcome the pain by being extra gentle and loving.James 3:17 But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere.